The Grand Tour / Amazon Video
The Grand Tour Season 2 streams on Amazon Video
The Grand Tour Season 2 Episode 6: Jaaaaaaaags
Episode Rating: Five of Five Stolen Hotel Robes
Defending Jaguar’s Honor
Jeremy Clarkson, James May and Richard Hammond start the episode by noting that Jaguars don’t sell well, even in their home country of England. They blame the reputation old Jaguars had of being extremely unreliable.
In an effort to prove Jaguars don’t always break down, the trio goes to Colorado to do a road trip in three used Jags.
Clarkson chooses a supercharged V8 XJR, while May shows up in a convertible XK8. Hammond wows them both with a classic 1967 420 G, best known as the car of choice for infamous British criminals, the Kray twins. Of course, they can’t let Hammond know they like his choice, so they give him the merciless ribbing you have come to expect.
Proving Jaguars are reliable got off to a rough start, as Clarkson’s car has warning lights telling him that most of his electronic aids have broken. Hammond’s Jag has a bunch of toggles for amenities that don’t work, and it quickly fills the cabin with smoke going down the road. May claims his car works fine and that his Check Engine light is just confirming that it works and the brakes shudder on purpose.
Very soon after taking off, the three presenters are reduced to a crawl as Clarkson’s transmission gets stuck in one gear. So, after topping off the fluids, they take the three cars to a dirt track, complete with jump.
May just does it very slow so as not to hurt his car, and Clarkson takes it fast to show off his car’s performance, spinning twice and just being out of control in general. Hammond drove his antique a bit too hard and over a jump that smashed the underside, cracked the rear window, and kills the car for good. ‘Proving’ how tough his Jaguar is, Hammond re-joins the others very quickly in his ‘repaired’ Jaguar, which is an entirely new car.
Clarkson, Hammond and May discuss Firefighters overzealous use of the jaws of life. Giving hilarious examples of them cutting up cars that clearly did not need it. They touch on the beautiful new Aston Martin Vantage and DB11 models, and reveal the most unfortunately named Chinese automotive company.
Back in Colorado
Trying to live up to Jag owner’s reputation, the three start the morning by stealing everything in sight from their hotel rooms. Later, they take a break to take in the sights. This break was only to take in the sights, and doesn’t have anything to do with the fact that now Hammond’s second car won’t start.
Having re-wired the fuel pump, Hammond meets back up with the other two after Clarkson got out of a speeding ticket by saying he was granted immunity by the Queen.
Hammond’s second car didn’t spend long without breaking again, and he is stranded on the side of the road with his car puking coolant. A local helps out by poking fun at the notoriously shoddy Lucas electronics before driving off.
The trio finds a runway to do a 0-100-0 mph test with a catch: the runway ends with a 1,000 foot drop off a cliff. Clarkson’s car is fast, and stops, as he describes, “medium-good” to set the benchmark. Hammond’s car is much slower and can only reach 60mph by the time he passes Clarkson’s spot. He finally gets to 100 and stops nearly a half mile past Jeremy’s car. James May has to back up to the very beginning of the runway, because his car has entered limp mode and he is unsure if it will go 100mph at all.
He only reaches 60mph by Hammond’s already dangerous stopping point, and, next thing you see is May’s Jag flying over the edge of the cliff. Don’t worry, though. Jaguars are so reliable that May is totally unhurt and back on the road feeling better than ever. His Jag even sprouted an extra four cylinders since he, too is now on his second car of the trip.
In a battle to find the fastest actor whose middle name is George, Kiefer Sutherland goes up against Luke Evans. Both actors first driving experiences were in Mustangs, and despite Kiefer admitting he is not much of a driver compared to Evans who had a role in the Fast and Furious, the Canadian actor blew Evan’s time away on the track. Sutherland did it in 1:17.8 while Evans did a 1:21.3.
It wouldn’t be a Grand Tour road trip without taking cars to a place they were never meant to go. So, the men stole some ski gear and headed to the slopes. To get up the slopes, they made a train by shackling their cars together, which went about as well as you would expect before they finally got the hang of it. Once at the top, they disconnect the cars and start down the mountain.
Immediately, Clarkson’s lack of ABS makes it nearly impossible to control his car going down the icy slopes. He is literally hanging halfway out of the car in case he has to bail out. The three can’t keep their cars from gaining speed and struggle to stay under control until the slope flattens out.
They then struggle keeping the rear wheel drive Jaguars going straight on a skinny section where there is a mountain on one side and a huge drop on the other.
Closer to the bottom of the slope, they begin to get the hang of skiing in cars and start having fun. Clarkson and Hammond make it down first, confident that they have proven that the Jaguar’s unreliable reputation is undeserved, just as May flies into the brush because his brakes gave out.
Road trips in used cars bring out the absolute best in Clarkson, Hammond and May. Trying to cover up how awful their cars were to try to prove the old Jaguars’ worth never got old, nor did their transformation to kleptomaniacs. The runway test was equal parts intense and lighthearted fun, and the ski slope drive was stressful just to watch. The conversation and celebrity segments were brief and interesting. This is exactly what we want out of this show. Only way to top it is with a special, which we can’t wait to see.
Quote of the Episode:
“That’s just having a rest.” – Richard Hammond as his “reliable” second Jaguar is stranded on the side of the road with a geyser of coolant sprouting from the engine bay.
The Grand Tour – Season 2
Season 2 Episode 1 – Past, Present or Future
Season 2 Episode 2 – The Falls Guys
Season 2 Episode 3 – Bah Humbug-atti
Season 2 Episode 4 – Unscripted
Season 2 Episode 5 – Up, Down and ‘Round the Farm
Season 2 Episode 7 – Coming soon